Regaining Control: A Simple Grounding Practice for Trauma Recovery
Trauma, whether from childhood sexual trauma, narcissistic abuse, or intergenerational pain, can leave us feeling cut off from ourselves. Our bodies, minds, and spirit drift apart. Anxiety spikes without warning. Emotions feel overwhelming. And every inhale can feel heavy, every step uncertain, every heartbeat unfamiliar.
If you're reading this, you might be asking:
How can I reduce anxiety and calm racing thoughts?
How do I reconnect with my body after abuse or generational trauma?
Is there a simple tool I can use right now to feel safe again?
Yes. Yes, you can. Today we’re going to learn a practical grounding exercise you can use anytime, anywhere, to reduce anxiety, reconnect with yourself, and reinforce safety, strength, and self-compassion.
Why Grounding Matters in Trauma Recovery
When trauma takes hold, whether from covert narcissistic abuse, childhood sexual abuse, historical trauma passed down through generations, or the abuse cycle of a narcissist, our nervous system gets stuck in “survival mode.”
We might relive past events.
Our body might feel numb, hyper-alert, or shut down.
Anxiety and flashbacks can swamp us.
Grounding helps interrupt that pattern. It brings our attention back into the present moment, into our bodies, reducing stress and activating our internal “safe” system. Grounding supports us through the 4 stages of trauma recovery: safety and stabilization, remembering and mourning, reconnecting, and reconciling with purpose.
Alongside therapy approaches like cognitive behavioral therapy for anxiety, cognitive processing therapy for PTSD, EMDR for sexual trauma, or family therapy to break the cycle of generational trauma, grounding is a tool you can carry with you daily. It’s part of trauma-informed care, somatic therapy, and relational trauma recovery.
A Step-by-Step Grounding Practice
Goal: Lower anxiety in the moment, reconnect with body and environment, feel safer and more present.
Setting the Scene
Find a safe space
You don’t need a quiet room, just a space where you feel moderately safe. A park bench, your couch, or even standing in the kitchen works.Check-in
Notice how you feel, physically, mentally, and emotionally. Name what’s present. (“Tight chest,” “racing thoughts,” “tired,” “worried.”)
Grounding Framework: 1→5→10
1. Connect with your body (1 breath)
Place one hand on your chest or belly. Take just one slow, gentle breath.
Feel the movement under your hand. It doesn’t need to be deep; let it be natural.
Say to yourself: “Right now I’m breathing, I’m alive.”
2. Explore your senses (5 observations)
Look around and note:
1 thing you see
1 thing you hear
1 thing you feel (texture or temperature)
1 thing you smell
1 thing you taste (even if it’s just the neutral taste of your mouth)
As you point them out, feel your attention move outward from your body into your surroundings.
3. Move with awareness (10 seconds)
Shift your weight, wiggle your toes, roll your shoulders, or whatever feels natural.
Notice what sensations arise: heaviness, lightness, tension releasing.
Say to yourself: “My body is here. I can move. I am safe to move.”
Affirmations to Reinforce Safety, Strength, Self-Compassion
While grounded, repeat silently or out loud, choosing what resonates:
“I am safe in this moment.”
“My body can hold me.”
“I deserve care, healing, and rest.”
“I have survived. I am strong.”
“Healing is a process, and I am doing it.”
Each affirmation counteracts trauma’s message that we are powerless. These words build neural pathways of resilience, safety, and self-worth.
How This Practice Fits into Trauma Healing
1. Rooted in Somatic Therapy
Grounding moves beyond thoughts by anchoring in physical sensation; it calms the nervous system. Somatic experiencing, progressive muscle relaxation, and other body-based approaches use similar ideas.
2. Complements Cognitive Behavioral Therapy
CBT tools (like worksheets, cognitive behavioral therapy for anxiety, and cognitive processing therapy worksheets) help change thoughts and beliefs. Grounding gives you emotional and physical regulation in the moment, supporting deeper work in therapy.
3. Supports Recovery from Narcissistic Abuse
During the narcissist abuse cycle of idealize, devalue, and discard, victims often feel disconnected, gaslit, and unsafe. Grounding offers a tangible antidote to dissociation and fear. When the narcissist goes silent or initiates punishment tactics, you have an inner “reset” to reclaim safety and trust.
4. Useful for Survivors of Sexual Trauma
If symptoms of PTSD, hypervigilance, derealization, or signs of sexual trauma in adults arise, grounding helps stabilize you. It’s a tool you can use alongside EMDR for sexual trauma, trauma cognitive behavioral therapy, or a trauma therapist specializing in sexual trauma.
5. Helps Break Generational Trauma
Patterns of generational abuse and intergenerational transmission of trauma get coded into family stories. Healing generational trauma and historical trauma often includes becoming aware and then embodying new ways of being. Grounding reconnects you to your body, your choice, and your lineage of healing. This helps break the cycle of generational trauma and abuse.
Real-Life Example: Hannah’s Experience
Hannah was working through childhood sexual abuse therapy. She’d hit a wall: anxiety flooded her when memories surfaced. She started using 1→5→10.
One breath helped her move out of dissociation.
Five observations brought her into the room, grounding her in reality.
Ten seconds of movement allowed tension to register and release.
Affirmations shifted her internal story from fear (“I can’t handle this”) to safety (“I can meet this moment”).
Within weeks, she noticed lower anxiety on the days she used it regularly. It became her anchor between sessions. Over time, her body remembered safety. She said, “This practice helped me feel like myself again, my real self, not just a survivor.”
Practice Tips and Variations
Use less if needed: If 1→5→10 feels like too much, try 1→3→5 instead. It’s better to start small than to skip it.
Name emotions as you go: “I feel fear.” “I notice sadness.” Giving emotions a name reduces their power.
Add mindful movement: A gentle stretch, walking, or yoga pose can deepen awareness.
Try tethered touch: If you’re returning to a triggering memory, hold a grounding object like a ring, stone, or grounding bracelet as an anchor.
Download worksheets: Pair your practice with cognitive behavioral therapy worksheets or EMDR preparation tools. This way, regulation and integration work together.
Practice regularly: Daily use trains your nervous system toward calm. Use before therapy, during panic, or before bed.
How to Build a Healing Routine
Start each morning with a short grounding ritual.
Check in midday, especially in transitions or after triggers.
Use it before or after therapy (CBT, EMDR, trauma processing, family therapy) to bring your body back to baseline.
Partner with a trauma-informed therapist, search for cognitive behavioral therapy, EMDR for sexual trauma, or relational trauma therapists.
Add complementary practices: journaling, mindful breathing, somatic release, art therapy, or trauma-informed yoga.
Reflecting on Healing Progress
As you practice grounding, notice:
Are symptoms of PTSD, panic, or anxiety less intense?
Are flashbacks or memory reliving being interrupted sooner?
Does your body feel more tethered, less floating?
Can you hold comforting truths like “I am allowed to rest” and “I am safe” more easily?
Small shifts matter. Grounding supports all stages of trauma recovery, especially the first two (stabilization and remembering). Over time, you’ll move toward reconnecting and reconciling with yourself, your story, and your life.
Closing Thoughts
Regaining control after trauma isn’t about erasing the past. It’s about reclaiming yourself, mind, body, spirit, moment by moment. With simple grounding steps, you build a bridge from anxiety to calm, from fear to self-trust, and from fragmentation to wholeness.
Let this 1→5→10 practice be your ally in the healing journey, supporting trauma recovery, breaking generational cycles, stepping away from narcissistic abuse cycles, and nurturing deep trust in yourself.
FAQs
Is grounding a substitute for therapy?
No. Grounding is a helpful tool within broader healing work, like trauma cognitive behavioral therapy, cognitive processing therapy, EMDR, or family therapy for generational trauma. But it enhances your capacity to do deeper work.
Can I use this with children or teens?
Yes. Use child-friendly language and sensory observations. Add a teddy or favorite toy to hold (like a “grounding buddy”).
What if I panic during grounding?
Start smaller, maybe one sense at a time. Engage a trusted person or call a crisis line. Grounded therapy resources can help you build tolerance.
Can this help with generational pain?
Absolutely. When healing classic patterns like generational cycles, generational trauma symptoms, or generational abuse, you also rebuild new neural pathways: my body can feel safe, I can feel at home in this life.
